Make a commitment to yourself.

As you discover gifts, passions, or activities that breathe life into you, commit yourself to staying involved in them in some small way.  Don’t take an all or nothing approach.  Often we think that if we don’t have forty hours a week to devote to something, we might as well not even try.  That’s not true!  A few hours here and there can make a huge difference—both in terms of the impact we can have on others and on the health of our own souls.  Be willing to compromise.  Get creative.  Set reasonable goals.  Use the small chunks of time you have now as an investment in your future dreams.  

Remember the importance of play.

Vocation, ministry, and family life often bring challenges that drain our energy.  If we want to be able to face those challenges consistently, we need to discipline ourselves to recharge our energy in light-hearted ways.  So, what do you love to do?  If it’s been so long since you’ve considered having fun that you have no clue what you love to do, think back through the years. What did you enjoy doing when you were a child or adolescent? 

When I first considered this question, I remembered that as a child I had enjoyed playing the flute, sewing, swimming, walking in the woods, painting, and reading—but I hadn’t done any of those things in years.  So I began experimenting with these simple pleasures from the past—and a few new ones as well—and it changed my life!  It brought me joy and energy that I need in order to face the more difficult areas of life. 

If you’re not sure where to start, begin to experiment.  Is there something you used to do but gave up long ago because it seemed frivolous? Is there something you’d love to try but you think it seems silly at your age?  Try it.  Again, just a little bit of time spent in a soul-filling pleasure can increase the energy, passion, and joy that you can bring to the people you love. 

Partner with another woman in a similar situation. 

Shauna has already set up a schedule with another young mom to trade childcare and food preparation on a weekly basis.  On Tuesday afternoons, Shauna cares for both babies, while Annette spends several hours on a work project and then cooks dinner for both families.  The next Tuesday afternoon they reverse rolls. 

When my kids were preschoolers, I had a similar arrangement with a friend whose son and daughter were the same ages as mine.  I used my “time off” for meaningful work, catching up on details, solitude, or play—whichever I most needed on a given day.  Too often women operate in isolation rather than working together as allies and making life easier for all of us.  Let’s change this! 

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